WOW. I'm just curious. Does time pass this quickly for everyone or just me? 31 years ago today, I had no idea that I would be giving birth to a beautiful baby boy within 24 hours. I had dreamed for years of having a boy. I had a beautiful healthy wonderful 2 year old girl and just imagined I would have another girl to be her little sister.
So it happened. This beautiful, healthy looking adorable bundle of male joy was mine. All Mine. Well, Lane's too, but you get the idea. A boy. Having grown up with a sister and having only had a daughter, I really didn't know what to do with a boy.
I guess it really didn't matter because just short of six weeks later, laying in the sweet arms of my momma, my precious son would peacefully pass way into the precious arms of The Father.
So many things happened within those few short weeks. So many things I remember now as lessons I would only learn many many years later.
I know all about God and His timing and His plan. But when people say that during a tragic time, it means nothing. Not.One.Single.Thing. This is one lesson I have tried to keep in mind over the years. You can say that to someone all day long but don't. Just don't. Give it time. Give them time. Maybe later than can hear that and understand that. Just make certain they are ready to hear it. They'll get there so be patient.
I look around me now and see all the beauty God gave me following this tragic time. Things in my life they may have never been had I not experienced this tragedy. Another daughter, more grandchildren. A great son-in-law. The list goes on.
Thirty-one years later, it is still fresh and sharp and painful. But I do know that there have been so many lessons that were so important. I smile at the memory of that sweet, perfect, beautiful boy that had my heart for 39 days and I know, without a doubt, that I have the sweetest most beautiful angel waiting on me in heaven.
I can't wait to see him again. Be still my heart.
